Hi EveryOne, 

Wow December – really?… Apologies for being super late with my ‘monthly’ newsletter (in all the years I’ve been writing these articles, this is the first time I skipped a month). I’ve been playing catch up since we got back from our Leura retreats (while working through another interesting healing curve) that triggered old patterns of low self worth. I wanted to share some of the powerful growth it ‘forced’ me into, hence this article is On Being Yourself 🙂

First some news…

• Welcome to all those who have recently joined us – I look forward to staying connected 🙂
• All classes, retreats and workshops are now finished for 2019, I look forward to creating more magic together with you next year 🙂
• Lastly – I’ve scaled back from the heavier body works of my holistic practice but my other services remain the same. I changed my business name Resoulutions 4 life to Happy Heart Holistic Healing, to mark this change… NOTE that the next newsletter will be sent from iam@happyheartholistichealing.com.au so be sure to whitelist this email… info@resoulutions4life.com & iam@resoulutions4life.com.au (my current emails) will soon cease to exist. Remember to ‘like or follow’ my new page facebook.com/happyheartholistichealing as my other pages will soon become obsolete… Now to this months article 🙂

On Being YourSelf

This poem encapsulates self worth – it remains one of my favourite quotes – so I thought I would share it…

On Being Yourself by Diana Cooper…

“You must learn that you cannot be loved by all people.  You can be the finest apple in the world – ripe, juicy, sweet, succulent and offer yourself to all.

But you must remember that there will be people who do not like apples –
and if someone you love does not like apples –
you have the choice of becoming a banana.

But you must be warned that if you choose to become a banana, you will be a second rate banana…

But you can always be the finest apple.
You must also realise that if you choose to be a second-rate banana, there will be people who do not like bananas. Furthermore, you can spend your life trying to become the best banana – which is impossible if you are an apple.

Or you can seek again to be the finest apple” 

In a world that’s becoming increasingly self absorbed, with ‘delicate’ attitudes all around, how do I keep others happy without compromising myself? How do I value my own worth without undervaluing the worth of others? How do I give and accept happiness only, in a society that’s run on fear – programmed to ‘take what I can when I can or miss out’? Well, when you find out let me know 🙂  Haha no, seriously – is it even possible? Well, with practice, I believe it is… But the key is consistency in the practical application of any newly received data. Otherwise it just becomes stored information – intellectual understanding – that’s not only wasteful but it can be dangerous. Believing I know something without experience to back it up is a recipe for disaster – and here are just some of the ingredients – denial, projection, blame, self righteousness, arrogance, criticism, judgement…… Intellectual understanding will only get me so far.

Looking around it doesn’t take a whole lot of insight to see that the world is in crisis – this is not to focus on doom or gloom but to be realistic about the current global situation – so I will know what to do as an individual and I will know how to respond positively to any potentially difficult situation. The transformation we are facing on a global scale is calling each of us to find our inner moral compass and cultivate our inner qualities. Awareness starts with turning inward, to check and change myself regularly to keep my power, rather than point the finger externally and lose it. Still, old hurts will rise up if they’re only partially healed and yes, I can still let the negativity of others make me doubt myself (particularly if I’m fatigued or in pain) triggering outdated low self worth patterns. So the last few months have been a series of painful but necessary transformative lessons and for that I am deeply grateful 🙂  But letting go of expectation wasn’t easy – to believe (even unconsciously) that I can please everyone is irrational at best, it deceives the self and distorts spiritual truth. I had to forgive myself and accept that no matter how hard I work – no matter how transparent and available I make myself to others – reality is, I can’t please everyone. And you know what? That’s OK! Acceptance enabled me to let go, knowing I do my best in every situation.

As I’ve mentioned before – our inner strengths work – when we apply them in our daily living! My biggest lesson to date is still to ensure my own self-care is not overlooked. When I take the judgements of others to heart for example – even though I see it as an opportunity to learn, grow and change – the old compulsion (if not paying attention) will pull me back into people-pleasing. I start to limit myself and quietly start to sink (and shrink) again! There’s no clarity or peace of mind in that, instead there is disempowerment – questioning, doubts, insecurity and self sabotage. But since acceptance is more graceful than resistance (because it hurts less) let me take responsibility for my own unhealed triggers. No use feeling sorry for myself. Everyone is on their own journey and we each wear different lenses (perceptions) in life – according to our belief systems. And though I initially recoiled back into the role of a martyr, I know I am done! I am determined to heal and keep moving forward so it’s important to self reflect – allowing the pain of others to obscure my own health and wellbeing is unhealthy on so many levels and it had to stop! I surrendered my fragile ego and clung onto the bit of self worth I worked so hard to reclaim…

OTo allow myself to sink into depression or negativity serves no-one, in fact, it only serves to bring the world down further. It was time to consolidate my many years of self-transformation – to once and for all stop allowing anything or anyone to ‘convince’ me to retrace that old path of self-flagellation. What I learnt from this journey inward was profound (and though these inward journeys always are) this time I felt a deep shift of self realisation, I’ve never experienced before. It was subtle, somehow quieter, more accepting. A disciplined mind really does lead to peace. Through repeated inner practices there comes a point where external disturbances may occur, but the negative effects on my mind stay on the surface, like the waves that ripple on the ocean surface but don’t have impact deep down. So I sincerely thank anyone who has ever triggered me – you helped me get to where I am today – a space of self love and self respect 🙂  Life challenges me to do better, it rises up for my benefit so I can learn and grow – and once and for all become the embodiment of light … What I experienced next was like the ‘Phoenix Rising’! And the words imprinted in my minds eye?… BE the best apple – BE YourSelf – BE light 🙂

Question: Do I compromise my own worth (become a banana) to please others?

Consideration: Why do I feel the need to keep others happy – even if it’s at the detriment of my own health and wellbeing?

Action: Whenever you catch yourself in an old disempowering pattern, remember to breathe, apply a brake and turn inward to self reflect with love and honesty. Accept what you need to change – then change it. Let go of what you can’t change. Do it again and again until you feel  the reins of your own life, firmly back in your own hands.

With the ‘silly season’ upon us (and fires all around Oz, lets each practice inner silence and self reflection as a means to stay cool and donate peaceful vibrations to those who may be doing it harder than us. If you celebrate Christmas then I wish you a merry one. If you don’t then stay safe, be happy…  And may 2020 be filled with love, peace and self empowerment 🙂

Lots of love always, Annemarie x

Feel free to forward to anyone you feel may benefit. If you would like to respond to or clarify any of the above, contact Annemarie at info@resoulutions4life.com. 

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