8 Ways to Stay Calm in March

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Hi Everyone,

In February I talked about procrastination and taking a shot at something (anything) to keep us moving forward in life. And as 2016 is taking off with a leap and a bound for many I thought it would be a good time to share 8 ways to stay calm in March, by reminding ourselves that though it’s important to keep moving forward (no matter how slow) we need to stay in check of our emotions and stress levels. Taking a shot doesn’t mean we allow ourselves to get stressed or burnt out in the process. On the contrary, staying calm while taking a shot ensures better success in our wanted outcome. Being in a hurry all the time not only drains our energy – it invites anxiety, depression, other forms of illness and it creates a negative atmosphere that affects our relationships (and the world at large) in an adverse way. Getting caught in the ‘rip’ of life and the deluge of everything moving too fast – situations we can’t  control, other people’s behaviour we can’t control, even our own out of control compulsions that govern our every action – can be frightening at best. It blocks our path and if allowed, can literally send us around the bend! Ever felt like you were losing the plot?…

Telling others to ‘be calm’ however, is easy. Doing it yourself is entirely another story 🙂 So if you’d like to reduce stress and/or conflict, if you’d like to improve your health and wellbeing, and your relationships – learning to be more calm and cool in every day life is definitely worth the effort. So below I’ve shared just 8 tips that help me stay more in control of my own responses, enabling me to let go and just get on with living life. It helps me cope with every day situations in a self empowered way, giving others space to do the same (what they do with that space however is an individual choice). Choosing to stay calm keeps us cool in heated moments so as to not add fuel to any potential flame nor contribute to the ever-increasing heat that’s slowly enveloping our planet… Ever think about how your attitude (like anger) creates heat that impacts our planet? Staying cool affords us a better handle on our interactions with others and with our environment… And staying cool helps manage chronic pain by reducing the inflammation (inflammation is heat too).

1. Regularly apply a brake throughout your day just to slow down. Speed bumps are “ridges set at intervals in a road surface to control the speed of vehicles” – their purpose is to slow you down. Applying a brake to your thought processes and thus actions, does the same thing. This seemingly small act gives you the leverage you need to stay calm – it stops you from speeding up only to lose control by days end.

2. Check and change your thoughts. When applying a brake, consciously checking your thoughts gives you an opportunity to change negative into positive. Positive thinking also prevents eruptions or spinning out of control.

3. Let go! Release any emotions of controlling or conforming. Helplessness or perfectionism. Expectation or disappointment. Judgement or projection. Anger or fear. Guilt or people-pleasing. Superiority or inferiority. Blame or self pity. Forcefulness or defensiveness.

4. Stop to smell the roses… or the frangipani… or the rosemary… or the parsley… or the coffee… the candles… the ocean… Just Stop! Appreciate the moment – any moment! Appreciation is just one step towards gratitude and gratitude helps us stay on track – calm, cool and clear.

5. Step back… Stepping back allows you to assess a person or situation before jumping in with both feet – it prevents you from becoming a victim. It also allows us to keep sight of the bigger picture (often lost in rushing) enabling you to respond powerfully rather than reacting defensively.

6. Breathe! It’s not uncommon to hold our breath throughout the day… When we stress we hold our breath. When we get angry we hold our breath. When we focus or exercise we hold our breath… Or at the very least, we breathe shallow. Learn to take deep, regular, slow breaths right into the pit of your belly (place your hands on your belly as a reminder to breathe down). On the in-breath your belly should be pushing your hands out and on the out-breath, your belly should be ‘shrinking’ away from your hands. If your shoulders raise as you breathe or if they are up as a ‘normal’ occurrence, you are breathing shallow. Shallow breathing or holding our breath creates an acidic internal environment that contributes to more stress, more anxiety, more illness.

7. Choose to respond calmly. That’s right, choose! I know I know, sometimes it’s easier to believe that we have no choice and yes, in some situations we may not. But when it comes to reacting angrily or responding calmly – we DO have a choice! So choose, then use your power of determination to just do it 🙂 Don’t react. Sounds easy enough doesn’t it? All the other tips serve to do one thing – to help us NOT react. Stepping back… Smelling the roses… Letting go… etc all help us towards keeping our calm, as a means to act in a self empowering way in our individual lives. As soon as we react (as opposed to respond), we’ve lost any ability to adjust in an empowered way. Meanwhile others will play us like a puppet (and then we have someone to blame). Don’t be a victim – choose your responses and practice it to be so!

8. Meditate… Today there is much proof about the efficacy of meditation in reducing stress, managing anxiety and indeed reducing and/or managing illness. There are also many types of meditation. Find one that fits you because human nature is such that if we feel uncomfortable or get bored, we rarely change. I personally practice and teach Raja Yoga Meditation because it’s very practical and I can use it anywhere any time 🙂

Question: How do I feel when I lose my calm?

Consideration: How does it affect my relationships and interactions with others? How does it affect the atmosphere?… Remember the phrase – ‘I could cut the air with a knife’.

Action to take:  Any of the above tips can safe you (and those around you) a lot of time and anguish though they must be applied practically on a regular basis. Often people will try something once then say it doesn’t work! Just choose one and try it out for a while before deciding it doesn’t work. If that one is ‘too hard’ try one that’s a bit easier to manage, you can always return to that one at a later time. Work your way through the tips till you feel that you can comfortably respond calmly to life with any of the above techniques 🙂

Stay well, Love Annemarie

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